CTC holds domestic violence awareness day
Fri, 2016-04-29 05:00
News Staff
By LYNETTE SOWELL
Cove Leader-Press
The Anderson Campus Center of Central Texas College played host to a domestic violence awareness and prevention event on Wednesday, and showed a variety of local support systems in place for those who are victims of domestic violence.
Gerald Mahone-Lewis, director of student and employee assistance program, substance abuse resource center, and risk management at CTC, organized the day-long event. Mahone-Lewis said this year’s focus expanded to male victims of domestic abuse and violence, as well as the LGBT community.
“In the past we have had programs on domestic violence, and one of the problems we had, we didn’t know at the time, is we only addressed one section of the community,” Mahone-Lewis said. “After last year’s event, we received a phone call from someone saying, ‘You’re leaving me out. I’m a man, and I also suffer from domestic violence.’ So then, we started having more communications through the community, and we realized we also have the LGBT community and they also have relationships. All of us have relationships. So wherever there was anger and violence, then there are issues with domestic violence.”
Barbara Stephens, an Educator/Community Liaison with Army Community Services Family Advisory Program, served as the keynote speaker. She cited a statistic from the National Coalition on Domestic Violence that one in four men is physically abused—slapped, pushed, shoved by an intimate partner.
“Domestic violence is domestic violence. It doesn’t matter what type of relationship you are in, it doesn’t matter what your gender is,” Stephens said.
Also, in looking at gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender relationships, Stephens said that abuse rate is two in five, comparable to the amount of domestic violence experienced by heterosexual women.
It is equally as difficult, if not more so, for those in experiencing domestic violence to speak up about the abused and take action to remove themselves from that situation.
With April being child abuse prevention month, Stephens said that children growing up in households where there is abuse, witness that abuse.
Following Stephens’ remarks, a Texas A&M University Central Texas social work student, who asked to be identified as “Ms. Kim”, addressed the group about her own experience in breaking free from domestic violence. Kim still has apprehensions about her former spouse’s retaliation, even after him being sentenced to a year in prison after a court martial due to his abuse. However, she was willing to share her story in the hope that someone else would gather their courage to break free.
Kim, a native of Korea, said there was domestic abuse in her home growing up. Then, when she met her husband, it seemed like he was everything she wanted.
“Within six months, I saw signs of my father in him, but I ignored the signs because I did not want to lose him,” Kim said. Within a year, she was pregnant with her first child and her relationship with her husband went into a downward spiral of abuse including physical, emotional and sexual abuse. Yet she said she didn’t leave him because in her culture, family should stay together, no matter what.
At last, she called 9-1-1 on him and still would not file charges due to her fear.
“The police officer gave me his card and told me to call when I was ready,” she said. Finally, after calling an abuse hotline, someone told her to get out of the house. “No one had told me that before.”
One of the things her former spouse did was convince others she was making up the allegations of abuse. The process that followed was a long one, involving many interviews, pre-trials, over and over, Kim said.
“The legal process is very, very tough,” Kim said, adding that her children also testified against their father at his court martial. She said she sometimes questioned if that made her a “horrible mother,” but “anything would be better than a dead mother killed by their father.”
“Two years ago I didn’t know what the word victim or crisis was,” Kim said. “I finally broke the chain in my family.” She said she now looks forward to her children’s future.
Along with Stephens representing the Army Community Service/Family Advocate Program and Youth Advocate Program, Families in Crisis, CTC’s Student and Employee Assistance Program, and Celebrate Recovery had informative displays at the event along with representatives to answer questions and provide information.
The Student and Employee Assistance Program provides free and confidential counseling for anxiety and stress management, personal loss/grief, test anxiety, depression, relationship issues and short-term marital counseling. Also at CTC, Alcoholics Anonymous and Overeaters Anonymous holds meetings which are also open to members of the local community.